I need to talk to someone, who is willing to listen.

 

There are good times there are bad times, there is night and there is day, no matter what life throws at you the sun always rises after it sets.
Everyone in life is travels on a road, every road is different, but some roads converge before parting, and while it is true walking with someone is always better than walking alone.
I offer this one caution. Reaching out to another road may not have the answer you are looking for. I know. I've tried. It usually leads to frustration and solidification of a solution you already have.

You used this medium to ask for a listening ear, I would appreciate it if you continued to do so for this predicament. However, I apologize, as I do not have access to the internet 24/7 so my times here are sketchy. I hope that I am an icebreaker and others will follow suit.

Your choice, I'm all ears.

 

Might wanna try a preist... You have stumbled onto an auto enthusiasts group here bro.

But give it a shot amyways, we have all had our ups and downs too, and anyone who owns an S series is a friend of mine too.

 

I'm old. I've seen a lot.

And I know folks who have been through far worse, because I had good luck, comparatively.

All platitudes apply because they are true.
I can tell you this, first hand .. never let a doc give you Paxil or anything like it. Makes things worse.

 

Well, I was contemplating whether or not I should post this, but I feel that those who are facing the same or a similar problem as me could use the advice that I am requesting. Now, this is really hard for me to do, I don't usually open up to others, especially to those I don't personally know; and I don't know if it is in my best taste to out this information.

Yesterday; Wednesday afternoon, my close friend passed out while jogging along the school track. An ambulance came, and on the way to the hospital she unfortunately passed away. She was only 17 years old, and was graduating this year. I have just been so depressed lately and I just can't stop crying. I understand that this isn't what she would want for me, but I just can't help it.

I know what I am about to say may seem selfish but I think what is making it worse is that she has been asking over and over for me to take her out on a date and today (Thursday) was the day that I finally was going to give in and ask her out, my friends have been pushing me so I decided to give in. I don't know how to explain this but, I am relieved that I hadn't asked her out prior to yesterday because I think that it would have been a lot worse for me if we did end up dating, but I also feel like I missed out on getting closer to such a beautiful, smart, genuinely amazing person.

I have been trying to think about other things and keep my mind off of this by doing other things, but every time I am by myself I just keep thinking about her. It is non-stop and of course every time I think of her I just break down and cry.

I just, don't know what to do, I don't want to talk to anyone, I don't want to go anywhere, all I want to do is lay down in my bed all day.

 

Try not to dwell on the 'what-ifs'. She wouldn't want you to be like this & if she's watching she'd be upset you're putting yourself through this. She'd be happy & sad that you were going to ask her out. Knowing that will make her feel good & sad that something happened & she wasn't able to have that date. It is for the better that you two didn't get together before this I suppose because it would be a whole lot worse with more intimate feelings involved.
Try to keep busy, throw yourself into work where you're forced to think of something else.
You'll for sure believe in the sayings: Don't put off 'till tomorrow what you can do today, or No better time than the present.

I know personally I screwed up a relationship by waiting because of personal reasons, thoughts etc. I've been kicking myself ever since but in your case (tough to read this I know but please) it was probably for the better that you didn't have a date earlier & who knows how things could have been when she passed.

Life - learn from it & it will allow you to make you a better person. <--- that's not being selfish BTW

I've recently & very suddenly lost a dog of mine. If anyone wants to try to compare a dog to a human & call me down on it... well don't bother!
My point is the feeling of regret. Regret I didn't walk him more often, didn't play as much as he'd like to, I regret I give him chit when he did something bad when in reflection it was me, my fault I didn't walk him more often, play more or leave things out that tempted him.
7 year old male rotti/bull mastiff cross. In awsome shape at 130lbs, died in front of me at the vets from a severe heart attack.

 

first off, i am sorry to hear that you lost someone close...esp so young....there is really nothing i can say that will express that enough.

secondly, it takes courage to ask for help and i think you will find a lot of people around here that you can talk to...this part of life is never easy and there is nothing that can prepare you for it.

i am sure that some people have told you how they have been in similar situations losing someone close...and i know that no matter what they say...it never feels like they hurt as much as you do now.

i too lost someone close to me at around your age....it was my grandfather...we were close and i was there with him when he died.
all i can say is that in time some of the pain will go away...for now as hard as it may seem...dont let it consume you. you need to try , as impossible as it may seem, to remember the times you shared that were good. it will be hard but find someone to talk to, face to face. it will hurt but its better i think to have someone with you while you work through this.

again while i am sure you have heard similar things....it is true. the pain is real. this is a part of life that we all will experience at sometime.

again, i am sorry for your loss.

jared

 

Everyone who has had a family member or close friend die knows what you are going through. I was close to my grandfather and he ended up getting pancreatic cancer. One of the worst types of cancer because it basically "took over" and there was nothing that anybody could do. I beat myself up over it because I wanted someone to do something about it. But when cancer takes over someones body, you can only pray for them, talk to others about your situation, and think about the situation yourself. I definitely cried a good bit and it hurt! It was like I had lost a chunk of my heart. But you definitely shouldn't bottle it up. That is how some people contemplate suicide. You need to talk to someone that can sympathize with you. Know where you are coming from. And besides this, TIME is the only thing that heals this type of thing. Nobody grieves forever, they eventually move on with their life. But right now, you are in a vulnerable state because it seems like you have let your guard down. Of course, this happens to everyone. This is why you need someone by your side to talk to. Just my .02.

 

in know what its like to loose a friend in school we grew up together basicaly we were brothers he had cancer that slowly crept up on him and there was nothing thew doctors could do. i regret not hanging out more over the years but it happens i just remember all the good times we had as kids racing power wheels on the street(dead end street) with his cousin and some of our other friends. i cry for atleast 2 days i miss him but ive moved on this time of year is hard as he past away around easter back in 2001. its gotten easier with time but it still hurts. just remeber the good times and dont dwell on the what if and what could have beens theyll only bring you down.

sorry for the loss

Greg

 

As said above, dont let it over take you, she wouldnt want that. Find your friends and spend time with them, it will help time pass untill its bearable. And lastly, stay away from alchohol, it will only make things worse. Keep posting, we want to hear from you