Toyhauler, its not too hard to pull it out, the first time it took me a few hours because of figuring out how to maneuver it out, you've gotta move the steering back and forth to get it to drop down, and there's a bracket back by the front drive shaft, i bent that out of the way and re welded it when i put it back, it'll make it go faster if you pull the front knuckles off and unbolt the drive axles then pull them out, it only took me about an hour the second time. I hope that helps you.

and I did swap out the transfer case but it didn't change much of anything...
but now it is more of a loud grinding noise than the pulling the front end around just not by much...

 

now i have two different people giving me different possibilities.
one says it could be dry/stuck cv joints.
the other says i need to get a matched set of parts Ie the front diff, transfer case, and rear diff all from the same vehicle...
are either of those good ideas or possibilities?

 

I don't really know the solution to your problem, but it sounds to me like you've kind of eliminated the transfer case as the source of the problem, and as long as you're sure that the front diff gears match what's in the rear axle then the problem is likely not in the diffs. Are you sure that the front CV axles are in good condition and not binding? the angles for the front CV's are within an acceptable range?

As for the diffs and transfer case all matching, the diffs definitely should match gear ratios but I don't think that it matters much whether they came from the same vehicle. The transfer case doesn't need to match the diffs. You should be fine using any as long as it matches the model that was originally equiped in your truck.

 

Please provide specifics on how you verified the gearing?